My Feelings Can Wait

Chapter 118

When Jing Xiu woke up, there seemed to be the sound of pattering rain outside, and the curtains in the room were still drawn, and he was so drowsy that he couldn't tell the time.She habitually went to look for Ji Youyan, but when she turned her head, the pillow was empty, and Ji Youyan was not by her side.

Jing Xiu looked at the alarm clock on the opposite bedside table, it turned out that it was almost noon.She rubbed her forehead, and sat up with the aches and pains all over her body.

Light footsteps sounded outside the door, Jing Xiu followed the sound, and Ji Youyan pushed the door open and entered.

She was wearing a simple shorts and a big T-shirt, looking like an ordinary home life.Seeing that Jing Xiu had already sat up, she approached Jing Xiu, bent down naturally, stretched out her hand to help Jing Xiu straighten her messy hair, kissed her forehead and said pamperingly: "Are you awake? Are you feeling uncomfortable? I was a little bit tired yesterday. No restraint."

It seems to be the scene that I have longed for countless times in the dream of being half asleep and half awake in those years.There were ripples in Jing Xiu's heart, and he replied "it's okay" unnaturally.

"Have you been awake for a long time?" She changed the subject hoarsely.

Ji Yuyan straightened her waist, touched her face with her eyes, and said with a light smile, "It's only a little earlier than you. Are you hungry?"

I don't know if the light around is too dim and ambiguous, Jing Xiu felt for a moment that besides gentleness, there seemed to be something else in Ji Yuyan's expression.

"A little bit." Jing Xiu looked at Ji Youyan.

But before he had time to delve into it, Ji Youyan turned around and went to the window, opened the curtains, and said in a casual tone: "Then go wash up, I'm ready for breakfast. Do you want to bring it in and eat it on the bay window? It's raining outside. It will be very comfortable to have breakfast while listening to the rain.”

Jing Xiu's eyes fell on the gloomy sky outside, and it really was raining. "It's all good." She suppressed the strange feeling just now, took her clothes and went to the bathroom, and asked concerned: "Where are Xiaoxiao and Yueyue? Have you eaten yet?"

Ji Youyan answered her calmly: "After eating, they went out. It's rare that I can sneak away for two days. I gave them a vacation and let them wander around freely. Don't you mind?"

"What if I mind?" Jing Xiu teased her.

Ji Youyan smiled and said: "Then I can only pay myself to...you." The smile in her tone suddenly faded with the words, and the last "you" Jing Xiu could hardly hear clearly.

Jing Xiu frowned, turned off the electric toothbrush, and Ji Yuyan's voice came in again: "Assistant Yao Xiao No. [-] is online, what can the master want me to do for you?"

The voice moved from far to near, "Do you want me to undress and undress you for personal service?"

Jing Xiu relaxed, sneered, reached out and ruthlessly closed the bathroom door, and locked it by the way.

She changed her pajamas and found the hickey under her collarbone in the mirror. She touched it lightly with her fingertips, and a shy and gentle smile appeared on her cold face.

Outside the bathroom next door, Ji Youyan stood for a long time, his eye circles gradually turning red.

After Jing Xiu finished washing, Ji Youyan had already put breakfast on the small table by the bay window.She crossed her long legs, leaned against the window frame and looked out the window, her long hair blocked her expression, but Jing Xiu keenly sensed the desolation in her figure.

Her mood suddenly dropped, and she sat cross-legged opposite Ji Yuyan.Ji Youyan came back to his senses, and smiled at her with the corners of his mouth twitching.

"Why are you unhappy?" Jing Xiu was silent for two seconds, and asked straight to the point.

Ji Yuyan froze for a moment, and opened his mouth as if trying to hide something, Jing Xiu added firmly: "Since I got up just now, you have not been very emotional."

After thinking for a while, she poked the red heart and said, "So, what happened last night, or when I was still awake this morning?"

Ji Yuyan was amazed at how sensitive she was to her emotions, and was speechless.She slipped her throat, and admitted with difficulty: "Ah Xiu, I'm really not in a good mood. But, you eat first, and I'll talk to you after dinner, okay?" She didn't have the face to hide her ears anymore, but I don't know how to uncover these things in a short time.Jing Xiu's question just gave her the opportunity to speak.

But Ji Youyan felt sorry for Jing Xiu who had worked all night and hadn't had a drop of water yet. He was afraid that they wouldn't be able to eat well after talking about it.

Jing Xiu's heart was flustered, her eyebrows frowned even tighter, and she said seriously, "Now that's like this, do you think I can eat?" She couldn't guess what Ji Yuyan was worried about for a while, but her intuition was that it was very serious. thing.

Ji Youyan showed a sad expression, hesitated to speak, Jing Xiu felt distressed, sighed and asked her: "Where's yours?"

"I've eaten." Thinking that Jing Xiu didn't know what price she had paid, and thinking that the strange pain in her body might be caused by the price, Ji Youyan had no appetite for breakfast at all.

Jing Xiu is obviously not convinced.She picked up the knife and fork, and shared half of the meal with Ji Yuyan, quite threateningly: "You can eat some more with me."

Ji Youyan understood what she meant, so he had to obediently accompany her to eat.The two chewed quietly, only the sound of torrential rain outside the window could be heard throughout the room.

I don't know the taste of food.

"Can we talk now?" Jing Xiu put down the meal after Ji Youyan stopped eating.She took the wet wipe from Ji Yuyan, wiped her hands and mouth, and looked at Ji Yuyan solemnly.

Ji Youyan looked at Jing Xiu with deep eyes.She was actually terribly afraid in her heart, afraid that the sudden addition of the last life between them would cause cracks in the rare peace of this life, and that the truth that was about to be torn apart would be so cruel that the happiness they had at this moment would become fleeting. bubbles.But she still responded very lightly: "Yes."

If she didn't ask clearly, she couldn't feel at ease from now on.

She slowly took out something from the pocket of her trousers, stretched it out in front of Jing Xiu - the red safety button lay quietly in her palm.

Jing Xiu's heart skipped a beat, but he still forced himself to be calm, trying to stop with stillness.

"Is this a medium?" Ji Youyan said surprisingly.

This question was completely beyond Jing Xiu's expectation, and Jing Xiu didn't react for a while.

"What medium? What are you talking about?" She subconsciously covered up, but Ji Yuyan caught the flash of panic in her expression.

Ji Youyan knew that he must have guessed right, his outstretched hands trembled uncontrollably, his voice was soft but resounding: "We are reborn, or, the medium of reverse flow of time."

At this point, the layer of tulle that had been kept between them was completely lifted.

Jing Xiu looked at Ji Youyan in disbelief, and was stunned.What does this sentence mean?

She knew she was born again, and she knew she was born again?Did she... just know that she was reborn, or did she know it from the beginning to the end?No, not right.She should have found out a long time ago, because Yan Yan has been hiding it too well.Yanyan should always be in a state of rebirth, otherwise how could he change his mentality in such a short period of time...

Thousands of thoughts flashed through Jing Xiu's mind, and he was flustered.Why has it been hidden all the time but suddenly exposed?Did she suddenly remember something she shouldn't know? !

"I don't understand, what are you talking about?" Jing Xiu tried his best to be calm, afraid that Ji Yuyan was just testing her.But her ending was trembling uncontrollably.

Ji Youyan confirmed his conjecture more and more, knowing that Jing Xiu must have paid something and didn't want to burden himself, so he tried his best to cover it up.Her eyes were filled with water, she held Jing Xiu's hand, and her voice was hoarse because of restraining her emotions: "Ah Xiu, don't hide it from me anymore, I remembered it, I'm sorry I didn't remember it until now."

When she spoke so sincerely, Jing Xiu was moved, and her eyes gradually became complicated that Ji Yuyan couldn't tell.Like deep pain, but also like containing boundless nostalgia and affection.

The rift that used to be erroneous, life and death never met again, seemed to lie between them all of a sudden.

Jing Xiu opened his mouth, but couldn't find his own voice.She didn't know what to say, and she was afraid that what she said would make too many mistakes.She is still not sure what the scope of Ji Yuyan's "remembering" is.

Seeing that Jing Xiu didn't speak, Ji Youyan sniffed his nose and continued: "Ah Xiu, I was reborn in May last year, I guess, you should be reborn earlier than me, so you can help me Make all the arrangements, including getting Tao to sign me early and help me take care of my parents. When I first came back, I wondered if I was dreaming. One of them was a dream or my fantasy. But I verified After several times, I was finally sure, whether it was before or now, it was not a dream. I really died once and was born again."

Jing Xiu's breathing became heavy when he heard the word "death", and the knuckles of his hands clasped on the table turned white.

"I used to think that it was God who took pity on me and gave me a chance to correct my mistakes again. Until last night..." Ji Youyan's voice was stained with tears: "Until last night, I held this piece of jade, and my memory came back. It was only then that I really remembered that it wasn’t God’s favor at all, it was you, Ah Xiu, who turned me back regardless..."

"Ah Xiu, you rushed back after I died, got this piece of jade, remembered what Master Daokong once said, begged my mother not to cremate me, maybe there is a way. But my mother thinks you are talking nonsense, not only If you don’t believe me, I’ll drive you away. But you didn’t want to give up your chances, so you still set foot on the road to find Master Daokong. It was you who paid a heavy price to exchange with Master Daokong, so Master Daokong helped you with the ritual. In exchange for our do-over..." In fact, she still remembered fragments, but she looked at Jingxiu's expression, and she was sure that what she said should be pretty much the same.

"Ah Xiu, we finally came back to the present, do you really want to hide it from me? Do you want me to continue to feel guilty for no apparent reason?" Ji Youyan clenched Jing Xiu's soft hand tightly, unable to hold back his emotions, tears Big ones rolled down.

Jing Xiu's throat was aching, and his heart was broken into pieces.She trembled her lips, and the tears hanging on her eyelashes finally slid down her cheeks.

Ji Yoo-yeon is right.

Those days that she kept hidden in her heart and dared not recall finally came to her mind unavoidably.

All the prices are not terrible, what is terrible is living in the world where Ji Yuyan no longer exists - knowing so clearly and clearly that Ji Yuyan is gone.

For the rest of her life, love or hate, she will never see her again.Like, those unforgettable memories are just a crazy dream of hers in the past 23 years.